Did I totally just mess up?

Context: Got engaged Sept. 2023, booked our venue 6 days later for Sept. 2025. The venue we booked is great! Has so so so much to offer compared to anything else I saw online, but looking back, we definitely got trigger happy and jumped at the first thing without thinking of the consequences of a 2 year engagement.

since we got engaged, I lost my dad, mom got cancer, fiance lost one of his grandmas, fiancé’s dad has had 1 of 2 total knee replacement surgeries, friends got pregnant or married, etc. Honestly just so much to process all the while i’m in law school and graduate in May 2025.

the problem: when we booked our venue, life was great with not a problem was in sight. However, the venue was 2.5 hours away from 90% of my fiances family/friends. At first, this wasn’t going to be an issue as the venue had promised that hotels would be going up and lodging was available, etc. Well then hurricane Helene happened and welp, that’s on pause for the foreseeable future.

save the dates went out about 3 weeks ago and this is when the problems started trickling in. Friends we thought would be there no matter what started making comments about how out of the way the wedding was and how they wouldn’t be able to come. my fiancés family started making comments too about how they wouldn’t be able to come and if we had it closer they’d be able to make it. When I say it was overwhelming, i’m talking about 50-60% of people we’re inviting saying they wouldn’t be able to come. heartbreaking and upset to say the least, but then reality set in that we probably screwed up with this one.

We decided to talk to our parents candidly about this situation and ultimately decided to talk with our planner regarding moving the venue to be close to family and friends. now we are in the process of finding a new venue. Thankfully, our vendors we’d booked are coming with us at no extra cost.

all this to say, now we want to change the date to later in the year. Amongst other things, this is the best thing for us as a couple and for our families to be there whole heartedly.

Am I just like totally fucking up? This is 1000% on brand for me. thinking I have my entire life planned out only for wrenches to get thrown like crazy. ironically, everyone we’ve even remotely mentioned this to is praising us and thanking us. so maybe we’re doing the right thing? obviously everyone will have this opinions and some will be annoyed or confused. but as my mom has said from the get go, it’s our day right?

anyway, thoughts, comments, etc would be appreciated(: has anyone like resent save the dates for a similar issue? has anyone else just had life mess them over so you’re just rolling with it at this point?

EDIT: Thank you all so much for such kind words and encouragement. This is not a decision we made lightly or on a whim. We’ve decided to go forward with moving the venue to our family & changing the date. You all made me realize this is a one time thing and I shouldn’t compromise that! Thank you so much <3