Remind me that I don’t care, please.

I’ve NACHOed after a bunch of stuff has happened over the years. We have SS15 full time (sees mom three times a year), but BM, MIL, and SS have all made it impossible for me to care or desire to be involved in SSs life. My husband is a stay at home dad and is a good father (not perfect, but he’s a lot better than what I’ve seen on this sub). I honestly do not like this child, he’s unpleasant, rude, completely entitled and ungrateful, manipulative, lies about everything, and his personality is about exciting as a piece of cardboard. His target for blame for his misery is me, big surprise, which is partly why I NACHOed.

Anyway, I’m finding there are times I care and it’s because I know blame will be placed on me even though it is not me at all and I worry about any fallout and how it would effect me or my little ones. Example: SSs thing lately is eating way less than normal, he’s not depressed, he’s even told his dad he wants to bulk up for football but he’s been acting like he’s scared to serve himself an actual helping and then scared to get seconds (his whole schtick is that he’s terrified of me) - unless it’s something he REALLY likes. Every meal I mention it to SO (quietly via text or when SS isn’t listening/around) hey, he isn’t eating much. My husband would get frustrated as if I was just trying to nit pick SS, until I explained that I was worried SS was gearing up for some claim that I don’t make enough food for him or prevent him from getting enough to eat etc. and MIL or BM will call CPS or something. So SO started serving his portions up to just prevent it.

Anyway, this morning we got a cold advisory that said hypothermia was a concern with the temperatures and to ensure hats, gloves, and our wear were worn. I see SS leave for the bus stop (sometimes bus is super late) in a sweatshirt and nothing else warm. I told my husband, hey there was that advisory, he needs to be wearing a hat and gloves and coat. My husband got super defensive and said he tried to but SS didn’t want to. Well SS isn’t the brightest so my stance is my SO should have told him he had to wear it until the bus picked him up then he could take it off. My SO continued being annoyed (mind you he wasn’t thrilled when I told him I wanted to NACHO but supported me anyway), sorry I cared! I just think about how he might go to a school counselor and claim we don’t give him proper outerwear or something.

Somehow I just suppose to not care… help me not care please!

Edit: what is the deal with teenagers not wearing outerwear?! Is it like “not cool” looking or something? I don’t get it, I will bundle up to look like a marshmallow to avoid being cold!