Having your cake and eating it

I've followed a fairly predictable path through all this. Moved from psychology to traditional forms of nonduality then to new age then to modern nonduality and then without any intention to do so just fell into radical nonduality over the past few days.

I'm reading only Richard Sylvester at this point. I gather he is part of the Tony Parsons "lineage" although that word seems a little overbearing in a way I can't quite explain.

Everything I'm reading pretty much resonates. There have been awakening events as described. What is described as liberation has also been experienced through psychedelics but not spontaneously and it hasn't stayed.

I appreciate the not giving advice and also the compassionate concessions he makes to the separate self at times to find something that's enjoyable or relaxing and do that or explore other therapeutic means if that's what we are inclined to.

The one thing that doesn't quite sit right at this point, and it doesn't just seem to be an artefact of needing to use language is the way the spiritual teacher and student relationship is spoken about. It seems to imply a drama triangle, a victim- perpetrator dynamic and subtly implying that this understanding is the hero. But if it has been seen that there is no one making choices and there is only unconditional love how can there be either misleading teachings or people who take advantage of others?

Here is a passage that seems to completely contradict itself unless I'm missing something...

"When I write of people who have ruined their lives, I mean that in this play of consciousness such things appear to happen. As long as the sense of being an autonomous person is still present, this is tantamount to saying that, in the individual’s experience, such things do happen. It is only in retrospect, when the self has been seen through, that it is realised that no one ever made a decision that ruined their life.

In writing about people who ruin their lives, for example by abandoning their partner, children, home and profession to follow some guru, I am simply emphasising a certain psychological trait that some of us fall prey to in the name of spiritual development. This highlights one of the dangers that can arise when we are seduced by one of the many stories about gurus and enlightenment."

To be fair one of his books does mention eating cake in the title. And for the most part I find the writing entertaining and seems to scratch the current itch.

I appreciate that people feel strongly about Tony Parsons et al. But this isn't an invitation to either big someone up or put someone down. I just fell into this stuff, not looking for right or wrong or true or false, just feel to explore the nuance.