I love cooking, creating, but I hate cleaning up. How do I get better?

Husband is always mad at me for not being able to keep a tidy house. I feel like I’ve gotten better over the years, but it is nowhere near where it needs to be. He grew up with a very clean and tidy home, and I grew up in a very average (in my eyes anyway) home. It wasn’t cluttered in any way but just normal level of untidy every day and super clean before guests arrive etc.

I am definitely a very messy, untidy person but I do clean the toilets, sinks, shower, wipe down counters, etc. I clean but TIDYING is another thing. I am not sure why but tidying clothes, objects, kids toys etc is so hard for me. I’ve tried konmari method but I feel paralyzed when it’s time to declutter. My husband is naturally a tidy person but he wants to see me keep tidy home, which is fair since I’m a SAHM. I guess when it comes down to it I just don’t enjoy tidying. I don’t mind cooking and doing arts and crafts, playing with the kids, etc but picking stuff up and putting them back, folding clothes, organizing deep overwhelmingly boring and dreadful. Kids and I have such a fun, fulfilling day at home but husband comes home and immediately gets angry at me for being messy.

How do I change. I want him to stop being so stressed out when he comes home. I feel scared when he wakes up or when he comes home because he’ll be mad. Yet I still can’t get the house organized. What can I do to make the house less chaotic. It looks pretty tidy but the drawers and cabinets are all crazy inside and there’s always toys on the floor in the tv rooom and the play room. Kitchen is pretty clean on the outside but inside the cabinets also crazy. There’s just a lot of stuff. Do I just throw everything out?