Depressed and hopeless

Sorry for being negative, I think this is the only group of people might know my feelings, thanks for allowing me to share.

I got fired while I was pregnant back in 2023( yes fired and I hired a lawyer for help and we end up with a settlement). Because of that I missed my last chance for h1b lottery, without any choose I changed my status to H4 under my husband. That means I cannot work anymore ( no I140 yet). After having baby I have terrible postpartum depression and therapist doesn’t work. I only have 2 family members back to my home country and they don’t care about me at all, we only talk when there is something important, eg, I let them know I married, have kid that’s all.

So at this point I am very hopeless, I used to work for big companies have a great career path but now i lost them all. Now I’m stay home taking care of baby and I don’t even enjoy it. I hated myself, my life and even my husband. I thought about sleep and never wake up, that might be a relief….

Sorry for the long post, and sorry for being negative, I really don’t know what to do or where my future is… 😔😔