Incredibly lost.

Not sure if it's been because of christmas and all the emphasis the world puts on spending time with lots of family/friends etc. . . But I'm (39F) really feeling it this year, to the point I'm having pretty dark intrusive thoughts.

My parents are dead. I do have older siblings but we haven't spoken in over 10 years and we have nothing in common anyway. I live over an hour away from where I'm originally from. I have a 6 year old kid and live with my partner ( not my child's father - we split years ago.)

I have about 3 friends but can't actually recall the last time we seen another. It's one of those relationships where it consists of sending silly memes or instagram posts every other day.

I just feel so incredibly alone and completely miserable. My relationship with my partner is suffering because I'm so unhappy within myself.

How do you overhal your life at my age and meet new friends?