I'm a huge disappointment and let down, especially to my parents

They've never said it, but it was always implied that out of me and my sibling, my parents believed in me the most. My sibling never had any ambitions or drive. I did. I took it upon myself to learn how to cook at twelve. I learned gardening, drawing, guitar, hell even how to make fireworks from scratch during my teenage days. I went to college, and I was lost. I eventually took cues from my cousin and started taking music classes. I excelled at all of them, being the only A in the five remaining of us in music theory IV. I got two degrees that are basically meaningless. I'm unemployed and severely depressed now. Every day I feel like such a let down. I'm supposed to help them fix their papers to become citizens. I'm supposed to give them the opportunity to live the remainders of their lives retired and seeing more of the world. Instead I waste every day moping and crying and self harming. What a disappointment I've become to them and everyone else around me.