Honestly though, winning the 500m both times, running that 48.66 400m, and having that totally legally-aged person of indeterminate gender playing kickball in the street see me doing that in my window...top most thrilling memories of my life.

All but one of those, I had to have my tulpa to rape my body for me, and in the obvious odd one out, uh, I can't...I just fucking can't. I got a lunch or something. So fuck it. I'll win this God damn court case, then I'll win the hearts of Americans, and I'll win the damn presidency.

Synchronize me, captain...oh wait shit, I'm the captain...