Should I go to the hospital?

I currently I’m having lots of suicidal thoughts. My life feels hopeless and I really don’t have plans to live past my birthday (November 12th) But I don’t have a plan on what to do. I’ve been more depressed them I am right now before but now that I’m an adult I feel like I have much less going for me. I have a BA in psychology but you can’t even get a good job with that in the US because you need to be licensed to get a good job which is fine. I already had plans to go back to school but getting a steady job in the meantime is literally impossible. No matter what I do someone is always criticizing me but I don’t even have enough energy to do anything. All I can do is eat and lay in bed. If someone asks me to do something I’ll do it but a lot of the time I don’t even want to be alive. I feel useless and absolutely worthless.

I don’t know who to reach out to for help. Or really if I even want help. If I talk to my mom she’ll call my older siblings and I don’t want them to call me. If I tell my dad he’ll just give me a lecture about how he’s praying and how it doesn’t seem to be working and blah blah blah. I could text my therapist but depending on what I say SHE might send me to the hospital. And I’ve heard horror stories which is why I’m apprehensive. I don’t know if this even counts as a crisis. I don’t know if I should reach out. I’m just really tired.