im heartbroken over office secret santa

this might be a bit silly, which is why i opted to come to reddit instead of complaining to my coworkers.

we did secret santa at the office and i’m super upset over it. i didn’t want to participate to begin with because of finances, but i work w my mom and she signed me up w/o asking and pulled for me. i got my boss, and he loves disney/marvel etc. i followed the suggestion paper very closely, and got him a limited edition scarlet witch funko pop that came with a comic and a mint condition spiderman comic from ‘98 (part 2 of “web of spiderman”) i thrifted a long time ago for myself but didn’t have room to display and figured it would go to a better home with him.

as all my coworkers were opening their gifts, it was obvious that everyone went above and beyond. stanley’s, VS pajamas, nice candles, nail polish, lotions and blankets, etc. it was exciting to see everyone opening their things and being pleasantly surprised, and it seemed everyone put a lot of thought into their gifts as we’ve all worked with eachother for years.

i open my gift, and i can’t hide my disappointment. it was obvious my secret santa had thrown whatever their kid got for christmas into a bag and was done with it. (i’m the youngest in the office and i love cutesy things and decorating my desk, but i feel that’s different from actual kids stuff)

they gave me “piggy paint”, a brand of toddler nail polish that is nontoxic for babies so they can put their hands in their mouth and not get sick from the polish, expired halloween candy (it still had the halloween wrapping on it- gave like 3 bags of skittles to my BF when he brought me coffee to cheer me up and he said they tasted like alcohol) and a really cute hello kitty christmas card that wasn’t filled out but i’ll probably use and give it away because it was a card.

im grateful for the candy and the card, and the piggy paint i’ll give to my friend for her goddaughter, she’s 3 so i think she’ll like it , but i can’t say i’m not upset over it. i spent so long searching for a gift , and was happy for my coworkers who seemed to do the same and receive really thoughtful gifts. i don’t want to sound greedy or something, and i guess it’s my fault for getting my hopes up in the first place.

everyone has been excited to find out their secret santa, but i haven’t asked about mine. im terrible at playing a poker face, so i don’t think i could hide my reaction. my coworker laughed when i showed her the nail polish and asked if i pissed someone off and they were calling me childish.

i feel so silly for being so upset, but i can’t help it. it was totally optional, what’s the point of signing up if you don’t care to try? i finally understand why people say to avoid office secret santa, i don’t think i’ll be participating again.

UPDATE(?):

i really wanna thank everyone that’s been so kind and can unfortunately relate. if anything was to be gained from everyone’s poor secret santa experiences, it’s 1) to not engage in secret santa to begin with, and 2) it’s nice to know i wasn’t alone in this. all of you have been so thoughtful and made me feel worlds better about my first world problem haha.

i actually had a great gift exchange with my two best friends tonight, where i got loving and incredible gifts from people that know me the best. including a sick chainsaw man shirt from etsy, incredible stickers, a baking pan and so much more. it’s so beautiful to feel so connected with strangers over something so small, but everyone coming together is really amazing and bonding. to be cliche, very christmas spirit-y.

you’re all worth way more than your secret santa gifts, and i hope santa treats you all well as he did to me. ♡