Delightful one-liner roasts

Just some neat quick-fire roasts to share. Share some more below!

Samus's jab is almost as dysfunctional as the people who main them
Bowser Jr mains think they're a Roy or a Morton but the reality is they're either a Ludwig or an Iggy
Donkey Kong mains would buckle if they tried to Cargo carry a twig irl
Sonic's fsmash is almost as big as people who main them
Sonic canonically runs almost as fast as the speed that women run from his playerbase
If you play Pythra, may I inquire about the orphanage you were left at as a child?
Kazuya players love to complain about his jumpsquat because it reminds them of how long it takes them to jump in real life.
ROB mains, just like the character himself, needs rocket thrusters to avoid crashing into the Earth on account of their mass
Game and watch players remind me of that one guy my cousin knows who owns a pickle collection
Cargo Throw really be cheesing me at a number that's nearly lower than the amount of seconds a DK main can last talking to a girl