[QCrit] New Adult Contemporary Romance IT STARTED WITH A SPRITZ (89K / version 2)
Dear ______,
IT STARTED WITH A SPRITZ is an 89,000-word contemporary romance that will appeal to fans of the enemies-to-lovers dynamic and European setting in THE SPANISH LOVE DECEPTION by Elena Armas, the slow-burn romance in THE LOVE HYPOTHESIS by Ali Hazelwood, and the blend of culture, glamor, and self-discovery found in EMILY IN PARIS on Netflix.
Blamed by her family for her brother’s tragic death, twenty-two-year-old Charlie Miller moves to Florence, desperate for a fresh start. Determined never to return to the USA, she sets her sights on a work-stay visa. When she lands a position as an au pair for the wealthy Montefiori family, she quickly realizes the job isn’t what she bargained for. The children are distant, rebellious, and constantly testing her limits. On a probationary period, Charlie must tame the unruly Montefiori offspring by summer’s end if she wants to earn her visa and call Italy home.
The task becomes treacherous when her heart is drawn to Diego DeLuca, the family’s gorgeous handyman. Unable to resist his quiet charm and calloused touch, she plunges into a forbidden romance, knowing that the estate’s strict no-fraternization policy could lead to immediate dismissal if they’re caught. Meanwhile, twenty-five-year-old Lorenzo Montefiori, the children’s uncle and the heir to the Montefiori empire, is determined to make her life miserable––constantly belittling her American ways and distracting her with his maddeningly good looks. As the summer grows hotter and cicadas scream louder, Charlie’s worries intensify when she hears troubling whispers about Diego’s ties to organized crime and the Montefiori’s fascist roots.
With the end-of-summer deadline drawing near, Charlie must confront her past, her feelings for both Diego and Lorenzo, and her place within the Montefiori family—or risk losing everything she’s worked for and falling back into a life defined by grief.
[bio redacted]
Thank you for your consideration.
[name]
[email]
[socials]
[number]
300:
Lizzie McGuire lied—this is not what dreams are made of.
Charlie’s sweating through her shirt, feet aching from her trek through Florence, where buses apparently run on their own secret schedule. She tucks a damp lock of blonde hair behind her ear and squints at the marble street signs.
Where did the agency say she was supposed to be picked up? Something like ‘Via dei Santi’ street. She pulls out her phone to double-check, but it flickers and dies in her hand, now a useless, overheated brick.
Great. She’ll never find the street now.
Charlie sags against the wall behind her, lamenting yet another au pair gig down the drain. She was supposed to have secured a host family by now, but it’s been almost a month, her wallet is growing worryingly light, and all she’s found is an endless stream of hopeful interviews and painful rejections.
As if mocking her, a stray dog trots across her path, pausing to take a shit right in front of her shoes. She watches him meander away and sourly considers giving up and going back to the USA—where air conditioning is everywhere, the street signs make sense, and finding a job doesn’t feel so fucking impossible.
A sharp memory comes rapidly into focus—a beer bottle shattering on the wall beside her, the windows rattling with the boom of her father’s voice—yanking her out of her doubts.
She pushes away from the wall. No.
She’s not going back. Not ever.
With renewed determination, Charlie begins asking anyone in her vicinity for directions. In her broken Italian, she asks a fruit vendor, who points down the cobblestone road. There, she finds an elderly couple hobbling out of an ancient church, who tell her to turn right.
_________________
You all helped me so much with my first version, and I wish I had discovered this subreddit last year. My opening scene was a total flop, and deep down, I knew it—but I wasn’t ready to face the truth. So, I started from scratch.
Is it okay to have three comps right away, or does it feel bloated? Should I stick to just two? I know Emily in Paris can feel a little cringey, but I see it as a ‘guilty pleasure’ show, which really aligns with my book.