My ex-fiancé needed space
I just wanna let this out, this happened a month after our 12 year anniversary in a relationship. I proposed to her April 2024. She asked for space and time apart from me, because she needed to find herself daw.
I asked why and how long. She said she just needed time for herself and reassess everything. How long? Uncertain.
I respected her decision, I moved out from our apartment where we lived in together for 3 years. I only had a bag, maleta of few clothes, and laptop. I left maybe around 80% of my stuff there and went home to my family.
A week after, I could help but ask her how she’s faring. Her messages were so cold that she told me that she doesn’t see her future with me anymore and she’s telling me Im better off without her. She said, “When I see our photos, I dont feel anything anymore, im sorry”.
My world was shattered, my heart sunk, and tears started to flow. There were so many questions filled my head. I wanted to win her back, and fix whatever needs to be fixed. But she did not let me. She told me to stay away from her… so I did.
Fast forward a month later, I started to focus on myself more. I learned how to love myself even more. The only thing that I could do is to move forward and go on through with life. I did home workouts, had a healthier lifestyle, rediscovered my passions in music and filmmaking, made new habits that helped me grow into a better version of myself. Self-care was not something I used to do, but doing it now made me look better.
I lost a lot of weight, had a clearer vision in life, and all the people around me started to notice that I look happier, brighter, and full of light.
I never felt so alive and free before. Im on the rise to become the best version of myself and nothing is gonna stop me.
Days forward, a few days before Christmas, my ex-fiancé messaged me. She wanted to meet-up with me because she felt I deserve to know the truth.
When I saw her again for the for the first time I couldn’t hold back the tears rolling from my eyes. Because this was the person I loved and the only person who could hurt me so much.
She confessed.
She confessed she had an affair with another guy. A colleague at work. She said she wasn't attached to that guy, but what's the point?? She cheated.
This wasn't the first time she did this to me. She already cheated on me twice before but I forgave her wholeheartedly because I loved her and saw her repentant.
But this is the 3rd time. What's worse? We we're living together and engaged…
I didn’t ask for the details when, who, why, how. It’s pointless now. After the meet-up we left in good terms, but I cried so hard after and couldn’t hold back the tears once again. I gave my full support to her all these time on her career. I saw her struggle at work, so I pampered her with nice meals and a clean space at our apartment. I took care of everything and sacrificed a lot for the both of us but all I got was betrayal.
Here comes December 30, she reached out again. With this text:
“Thank you for all the love you have given me for the 12years that we were together. You have shown me how I should be respected and cared for. And I am so sorry to have wasted all that. I will forever regret hurting you. You deserve better. You will always be my TOTGA.
May you have stronger body, health, and mind this 2025. Again, I am so sorry for everything and I wish you well.”
Pinusuan ko lang. I didnt reply.
She humbly asked me to put all our photos in a hard drive for her safe keeping. But I already prepared a google drive link of all our photos from my phone and camera. It just got me thinking, when she needed space she said she felt nothing when she sees our photos. Now, she regrets saying those words and everything she has done. Its all too late now.
In the end. I still forgave her before the year ended and wished her well on her future endeavours.
I now truly believe that every we meet person has a purpose. She was the right person to break me so I could rebuild myself to be a better man, to know my non-negotiables and to raise my standards.