My Mind Never Shuts Up – Is This What Life Feels Like for Everyone Else?

I'm 22, and I hear myself in my head almost all the time. I'm always living there—thinking, analyzing, replaying situations, conversations, and everything I say before, during, and after it happens. Even when I'm alone, it's the same. At night, I overthink everything.

I feel like this constant thinking consumes so much mental energy and robs me of the ability to enjoy moments, connect with people, and just be. Yes, I know this might be tied to anxiety, and I’ve worked on avoiding negative self-talk or spiraling into negativity. It helps a bit, but the thinking itself doesn’t stop, and honestly, it’s exhausting.

I’ve also been battling a porn addiction, and I don’t know if that’s somehow contributing to this state of mind. I feel like it messes with my brain and my ability to be fully present, but I’m still figuring things out.

I tried meditating—it works for an hour or two, and my mind calms down, but then the chatter comes back. The only time my mind completely shuts the f*** up is when I smoke pot. And oh god, how beautiful life feels in those moments—just being there, fully present, aware of everything around me. My social skills skyrocket too; I’m funnier, wittier, and just alive in the moment. I don’t smoke anymore, but I can’t forget how real and connected life felt then.

Here’s the thing—I remember a time, maybe before I turned 20, when life was like that naturally. I didn’t overthink so much. I enjoyed moments, felt hyped about life, and had real, present conversations.

At the same time, I know I’m still figuring out a lot of things in life, and maybe it’s normal to feel anxious and lost at this age. I just wonder if there’s a way to quiet the mind without substances and get back to that place of being present, enjoying life, and really living instead of constantly thinking.

So my question is: Does anyone relate to this? How do you turn off the constant thinking without substances? Is this what “normal” people experience—just being there without living in their heads all the time? Is there a way to get that back sober?

Would love to hear your thoughts !