How do my fellow FTM folks handle bottom dysphoria during freaky time?

I’m a FTM and have been transitioning for almost a year now. So far life has been completely turned around for the better: I feel like a completely different person and I know I’m unrecognizable amongst my peers with just how much I’ve changed and I love it.

There’s just one problem I have come across recently with my transition. Bottom growth.

Don’t get me wrong the size of my friend isn’t the problem. It’s whenever it’s time for freaky time or when I’m self pleasuring I get too much into my head. To where it no longer feels good or when I feel like I’ll have an orgasm it just disappears.

My partner will try anything to make sure im comfortable and I’ll forever be grateful for them but to explain how I feel goes a little like this:

1) I’m horny 2) finds something that is pleasurable to watch or to think about 3) Pleasuring process goes fine 4)Pleasuring goes more than fine and I’m really into it about to bust 5) All pleasure and fantasies disappear like a popped bubble 6) and now I’m pissed cause idk what happened

Does anyone experience the same thing as me? I was thinking maybe I need to upgrade to a new sex you or try a pocket Pussy or even a pump because I use a vibrator.

Need a little help!