So, TMI but does anyone else deal with incontince?

TL;DR Autistic in my thirties and have been incontinent all my life. Am I alone in this?

So, I'm mid-thirties and an autistic AMAB(they) person. I do have some higher support level needs than other independent autistic adults. I live on disability though I have a had a few jobs in the past for example.

My main question however is how common are continence problems for other mostly independent autistic people in this group? I feel so alone on this issue sometimes because I have struggled with incontinence my whole life.

I toilet trained at a later age than my peers in school, and still hadn't grasped it fully in high school. I experienced several setbacks with this issue even now.

I have tried everything from biofeedback, to charting, to alarm setting and the like. A few times in life I have had it mostly under control unless I was over-stimulated or distracted. My urologist and Neuro haven't been much help either. In recent years with my MS diagnosis, and an mtbi I have found it really hard to even recognize the need to go.

This is a really embarrassing issue to be dealing with at my age and honestly I just want some validation from others in a similar boat.