Maybe just a vent and not advice

Maybe just a rant and not advice

You know when you’re looking for a woman or you have a woman in mind of who you’d like to be in a relationship with sometimes you don’t really know until you actually get into it and have experience. We think we want one thing and then we get it and think we need something else. I’ve had a few beers and I’m kinda tipsy but it’s definitely easier for me to talk when I’m a little buzzed.

I guess something that’s been bothering me is trying to make the right choice. Sometimes I don’t know what I want or what I need out of a relationship. Other times I do. I think ultimately I do know, but I let short term things affect it.

What’s crazy, and I’ll be totally honest, is I’ve never masturbated to my girlfriend in the 6 years over known her. You know when there’s that super strong lust on someone, and you want to FUCK. Because, there is a difference between sex, making love, and fucking. I’ve never wanted to FUCK my girlfriend, and I feel terrible saying that. The thrill and desire is just not there. And it never really was, but she’s been able to provide me with every last thing that I want and need. I constantly still lust for other women, and want to freak off regularly. Once I get that out of me there’s no one else I want to be with but my GF. She has everything else I want and need, it’s just… that thrill and chase and desire isn’t and hasn’t ever been there. I don’t know what is more important to me but it’s clearly a difficult position to be in if I’m sitting here writing this. And I haven’t brought it up to her either. Has anyone else been in this position? And did you choose love or sex being more important in the relationship? I feel like I’ll always be tempted. It sounds really weird saying I’ve never really WANTED to fuck my gf. But I love her dearly, perhaps I’ll crave her more as we continue to grow