Anyone else relate/have advice? I got told my WP reason for cheating was because i gained weight

I gained 50lb after having our third child 10 years ago. We both struggled with 3 kids under 5, then when my youngest was 3 my WH started cheating. He’s used prostitutes and also had at least 5 affairs with married women on cheating sites that each had 4 sexual encounters before he broke them off. He’s driven 100s of miles to see these women. He’s posted up dating profiles, toned his body to attract them, bought nice clothes to wear to see them. He claims it became an addiction. I’ve no idea what his body count is now. When we got married it was 2. He’s my only. I find it all quite sickening.

He’s had depression our entire 15year marriage and I’ve never felt I was enough for him, our life has never made him happy. Now he says he does find me attractive and wants to stay. He doesn’t want me to leave. He says he feels he can be happy with me and was trying to stop but I struggle with believing him. He says it felt like the devil had hold of him and now he’s finally free of it. I love him, I do want to stay. I genuinely want to R. But he’s hurt me what seems irreparably at the moment. How do I build myself up when he claims he cheated because i got overweight and he wanted to fuck thin women? How do I build back trust again?

Also for the record I’m not that much overweight, if I lost 30lb I’d be considered slim. I don’t find myself unattractive either.