The past almost feels like it doesn't exist

I have full aphantasia of all my senses and SDAM. I feel like this messes up the way I connect with loved ones. I like others on here generally don't miss someone. Of course I want to see my loved ones when I think about them but my memories are all based on thoughts and words, I can't experience the emotion that I felt during a time. And when someone dies that you love, this sucks. It's like an emptiness... it's like all my past experiences are a lie, it's only the now. It's like the past doesn't even exist in a way...