I need help

I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m so stressed out because there are so many things to believe in, and I keep asking myself, “What if I’m right? What if I’m wrong?” As a Christian, I want to believe in an afterlife, but sometimes I get terrified. I don’t want to lose my family. I want to believe, but some parts of the Bible are hard to understand or accept. For example, is Adam and Eve real? Is Noah’s Ark real? Is the Tower of Babel real?

What I do believe is this: If we were farther from the sun, we would freeze to death. If we were closer, we would burn to death. Earth is the only planet with a perfect magnetic field. I don’t believe in evolution, but I do believe in microevolution. It’s just confusing. The way we can talk, write, breathe, eat, love, and feel—no big bang or explosion could have caused that.

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but there has to be a Creator. I know a lot of people don’t believe that, but I feel like there has to be. It’s funny how much time we spend saying Earth is trash or imperfect when, in reality, it seems impossible that we got such perfect living conditions and all this beautiful life by accident.

I’m sorry for thinking this way, but I love my family. My family isn’t big, but it’s all I have, and I can’t imagine a life where I’m not here or where they aren’t here with me.