What now?

I feel like im having a break down. In about a week, I’ll return to a place where I am sure I’ll feel 10 times worse. So my mind keeps thinking about what to do.

I am not feeling good at all. I have dark thoughts and though I dont think I’d ever go as far as to actually end things (I’m insanely afraid of death), I still feel like I need intense help at this point. I don’t really have any hope for life and my future anymore. Do I get myself checked in somewhere? I don’t know what I am doing or where to go from here